This Is One of the Rare Occaisions When I Can Actually Use the Word "Atwitter"

Evey human English-speaking person who has been born upon this earth gets no more than three chances (if he's lucky) to use legitimately the word "atwitter" as an adjective in a sentence in his lifetime.

And this is one of them.

Because all of D.C. is positively ATWITTER (!) with gossip over the White House's White Tie Dinner for Queen Elizabet II that George didn't really want to have but that Laura somehow talked him into.



But that's old news. Here's the BIG news!

We've got the highly coveted GUEST LIST!

Okay. No, at this late a date, it's no longer exclusive or impressive that I've got my hands on the guest list for this affair. But what I DO have is a truncated list of People Whose Names I can Make Fun Of. Such a list follows Immediately below:

• Cmdr. Heber Ackland, Royal Navy, equerry in waiting to the queen. (Herber? As in the answer to the question, "What name is worse than 'Herbert'?")
  
• The Countess Of Airlie, DCVO, DCVO, lady in waiting. (We have guys here in the States who are named "Airlie." They have brothers and friends with names like, "Merl," "Heck," "Slim," and "Jubal." It kinda sucks the impresiveness of being countess of it over on this side of the Atlantic.)
  
• Some dudes and some other people...
  
• Rep. John A. Boehner, R-Ohio, House minority leader, and Deborah Boehner. (You get FIVE guesses as to how the name "Boehner" is pronounced. Here's a hint: Your first five guesses are wrong.)
  
• Some guy...
• Calvin Borel, jockey, winner of the 2007 Kentucky Derby, and Lisa Funk (guest). (Calvin Borel, YOU DOG! I have no idea what Lisa Funk looks like, but based on her name, she MUST be hot!)
• Some others...
  
• Miss Barbara Bush and Jay Blount (guest). (Whoa! Either Bush's mom or else his daughter is hooking up with Jay Blount. Either way, this is mind-blowing!)
  
• Jeb, the Veep, some other guests, etc...
  
• James Click, president, Jim Click Ford, Inc., and Carrie Click (daughter). (This is indeed an occaision! England, I hope you appreciate this. Our most prominant Used Car Salesman is getting dressed up for this event!)
  
• Some other guys and their guests...
  
• Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip. (These two names appear only three entries down from Jim Click of Jim Click Ford! They must be important!)
  
• William S. Farish, former U.S. ambassador to the United Kingdom, and Sarah Farish. (I couldn't figure out how a former ambassador to Britian could've sneaked their way into this white tie affair. Then, I remembered, a Farrish runs one of the biggest Jeep, KIA, Subaru, Buick, Pontiac, GMC dealerships in northern Virginia. He must be here with Jim Click.)
  
• Couple other guys...
  
• Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates and Becky Gates. (Becky, we need to chat. Robert stopped going by "Bobby" on invitations to Formal State Dinners when he entered first grade. Maybe it's time to realize that there is no shame in being called "Rebecca" on special occaisions.)
  
• Christopher Geidt, OBE, deputy private secretary to the queen. (I'll admit, I thought it was kinda weird that the Queen's OBE made the official guest list to the most prestigious ever white-tie dinner ever to be held by this administration. But she is the Queen, and if she wants her gynocologist on the invite list, so be it!)
  
• A historion guy, a news guy, other people...
  
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck, host of "The View," and Timothy Hasselbeck, professional football player. (Elisabeth is the sister-in-law to America's greatest-ever quarterback, Matt Hasselbeck of the mighty Seattle Seahawks. So, it's pretty obvious how she got invited. Also, I hear she sometimes appears on T.V., so it sounds like a sterling resume all around! Way to go, Elisabeth!)
  
• Two guys...
  
• Ray L. Hunt, chairman of the board, president and CEO, Hunt Consolidated, Inc., and Hunter L. Hunt, president, Hunt Power, L.P. (son). ("Hunter L. Hunt, president of Hunt Power." I think the only reason this guy was invited was that people were afraid that they would be killed for not inviting someone with a name THIS awesome! )
  
• Brig. Miles Hunt-Davis, KCVO CBE, private secretary to Prince Philip. (And then there's THIS guy, trying to ride in on the coattails of Hunter L. Hunt president of Hunt Power. Nice try, Miles Hunt-Davis, but no cigar.)
  
• Other guys, other guys and...
  
• Henry A. Kissinger, former secretary of state, and Nancy Kissinger. (Dammit! If I'd known THESE people would be there, I would have RSVP'd. I can do a WICKED Kissinger impression.)
  
• Peyton Manning's relatives and...
  
• Peyton Manning, professional football player, and Ashley Manning. (Peyton Manning is really good. His nickname is Peyton "Matt Hasselbeck, if Matt Hasselbeck played for Indianapolis and wasn't overrated" Manning. So he's a really good football player too.)
  
• some other people, and some other people and...
  
• Arnold Palmer, professional golfer, and Kathleen Palmer. ('K. If we've gotton to Arnold Palmer, we SHOULD be getting very close to the end of this list...)
  
• Some politicians, some statesmen, some musicians...
  
• Colin L. Powell, former secretary of state, and Alma Powell. (Yes, we once had a secretary of state named "Colin." Now if only "Alma" turned out to be a name for part of the female anatomy, the irony wold be complete!)
• A guy, Nancy Reagan,
• Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Gene A. Washington, director of football operations, National Football League (guest). (Yow! a dude gets to work as an exec for the NFL AND he gets to hook up with Condi! I am officially jealous!)
  
• Lessee... Chief Justice.. his guests... Others... No one with a funny name...

Um. So, If I can't make fun of the names, then that's about the end of the list. At least for the purposes of this post.

At any rate, I've finally gotten to use the "A-Word." Once in the title to this post, and twice in the actual post. The technical question then arises: Am I done with the "A-Word" forever now that I've typed it three times, or does this post officially count as ane single use of the "A-Word," thereby allowing me to use possibly two more times before I die?

Stay tuned to find out!