According to the Action News Team, Oprah Will Lead Healing After Imus.From the headline, I had assumed that this meant Oprah would be taking up Imus’s role as a healing leader now that he’s gone. It turns out that the headline’s syntax simply had me confused. What the headline really means is that Oprah will be leading us in our healing as we deal with our pain after the Imus brouhaha.
That is certainly a great thing since there is probably no greater news story in the recent days that has left the American people so shocked and traumatized as the events surrounding Don Imus saying something stupid on the radio a couple weeks ago.
Great reporting, Action News Team! Thank goodness we have Oprah to lead us through the darkness that Imus has left in our souls.
Over at Dave Barry’s blog, we have a link to Channel 9 reporting on an important story concerning Irritable Bowel Syndrome. The story is six sentences long, so I will summarize for you: A Florida woman uses Irritable Bowel Syndrome as her excuse for shoplifting.
I will be following this story very closely. If Irritable Bowel Syndrome turns out to be an effective legal defense, I will try using it to talk my way out of my next traffic ticket:
OFFICER: Sir, do you realize you were going 98 mph through a residential neighborhood?
ME: Yes. You would not believe how badly I need to make a grumpy.
OFFICER: Please proceed, sir.
By the way, did anyone else notice that Channel 9’s banner is a boring old cityscape?
Lame! Where’s your Action News Team, Channel 9?
1 comment:
¨Make a Grumpy¨ I love it!!
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